My name is Ngozi, a 27-year-old heartbroken girl from Delta state.
Please
I am writing this because I am in a confused state right now. I need an
urgent advice before i take a decision that might end my life or keep
me alive.
I met frank when I was 20yrs, he is from Issoko while
am Ibuzu according to my parents because we have never travelled to my
town before. Frank was my first (I guess you know what i mean).
He used to be the prince of my life, he was everything I wanted in life
and all i desired. I was doing my ND then while he was an undergraduate.
As the relationship blossomed, I introduced him to my parents and to my
surprise, they didn't like him, but the had no choice because I love him.
During
our final year he got me pregnant. Both families met and agreed we
should get married. And it was also agreed it would be after I had my
baby as their tradition demands. But prior to that Frank has started
behaving somehow. He nags,beats me and complains over virtually
everything i do.
To avoid taking much of your time, I had my baby
and for five horrible years, I lived in his parents house while he
lived in a three-bedroom apartment he rented with his friends somewhere
on the island. He never wanted me and my baby to come and stay with him.
On one occasion I visited unannounced and i caught him with another
girl. I pretended I didn't see him and went home.
In all the
5yrs I have been with him, I never cheated on him, but he has been
enjoying himself alone, although he sometimes gives me money for my child. Soon after, I got pregnant for him
again. This time my dad was so mad at me, he asked my man to come and
pay for my bride price, but his family, especially the mum, insisted
that he must finish getting his Masters Degree before anything. During those period that I lived with them, the mother was a virus
that tormented my life and whenever I complained to my father, he would
say it is marriage and that I should endure. I had no option than to
keep enduring.
During my second pregnancy,
a fight broke between me and my man, in the presence of my junior
sister. It was a serious incident and I was eight months pregnant at the
time,and after that, the love I have for him died.
It was when I
gave birth to my second child that Uba came into my life. He is of thes
ame age with my kids father, he's not rich and live in a apartment he
rented with his friend. He was so good to me and my kids, I fell for him. In fact it was the love I had for him
that made me go back to my fathers house. And this decision made me
keep more distance from the father of my kids and create time for my new man.
We had a wonderful time and plan future together and he's planning to
get his own apartment this year and formally come and ask for my hands
in marriage.
But the issue now is that, my kids father suddenly
want me and my kids to come and stay with him for the first time in
6yrs, while I have been spending a beautiful and wonderful eight months
with Uba.
I love Uba, even my last child had spend more time
with Uba than his own father. But my kids' father came with his family
asking for my hand in marriage and am confused. My father suddenly love
my kids father and he is forcing me to marry him at least for my kids,
but my heart lies with Uba. My father want me to marry him by all means
against my will or even trying to ask for my own opinion. Though he knew
i have Uba but he never care to know him.
I am very confused because Uba has sworn not to let me go, my kids father want me back by all means. Infact he has closed my Facebook page that's why i begged my friend to use his page to post this. He also damaged my sim card and my father supported him and also gave me just one week to go and live with my kids father.
I
would have run to Uba's house if it is only me but my kid only survive
through me. I want to follow my kids father for my kids, but i don't
want to regret ever taken such decision.
Please help me with your advice.
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